


and your eyes look like coming home

by akosmia



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Cooking, Domestic Fluff, F/M, Fluff and Smut, Praise Kink, more fluff than smut honestly
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-04
Updated: 2018-10-04
Packaged: 2019-07-25 05:37:28
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,545
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16191173
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/akosmia/pseuds/akosmia
Summary: "You know," he says, his tone deliberately casual - too much, for him. Rey's eyebrow quirks up and she tilts her head to the side, studying him. "I've never cooked for anyone else. I mean, I have made something for Poe every once in a while, but- never a whole meal. But I like it, cooking for you".She doesn't know how to reply to that, because it feels - sobig. They barely know each other, and they have seen each other twice, but it's all so natural and easy, and she can't help but smile and say, "I like it too".-- or: Ben loves to cook for Rey, and she's not complaining.





	and your eyes look like coming home

**Author's Note:**

> guess who's back, back again :D  
> well, not really, but since my next multichaptered fic is proving to be quite a challenge (read: i am lazy and i don't actually how to do plot) and it will probably be a long time before it will see the light of the day, i figured i could write something short(ish) and fluffy. maybeee, if things go well you can expect some other fluffy stories like this, but i don't promise anything because my last year of uni starts on monday and i will probably be studying all the time :/ 
> 
> anyway, i know there are probably a lot of fics with this concept, but i love the idea of Ben cooking for Rey, so what can i say *shrugs* i am weak for fluffy, domestic reylo and i will always be ♥ oh, also note that i can't cook anything except for pasta and cookies, so don't mind me :D

The first time Ben cooks for her, they're at Poe's place and they've just met. She's sitting at the kitchen table, watching him flip some toast on Poe's old stove with practiced ease, moving around the kitchen as if he belonged there somehow, and the tips of his ears are flushed red - a detail Rey finds adorable.

Poe and Finn are on the couch watching some sort of game Rey didn't bother to pay attention to, or, to put it more accurately- they are making out while pretending to watch the game, and Rey must admit she has tagged along more out of spirit of companionship than because she was really interested in the game, so at the first sign of her friends _getting down to it_ , she bolts out of the living room and stands in the kitchen doorway, staring at the man who's currently standing in front of the stove with what she imagines it's a focused expression.

"I'm making toasts," he had announced right after he had introduced himself to her and Finn, scarlet red and stumbling on his words, and had disappeared into the kitchen sparing no glances behind, leaving the three of them staring at the place where he had stood until a second before.

"Don't mind him," Poe had said, in the end, flopping on the couch next to Finn and snaking an arm around his boyfriend's waist. "He's- well, his social skills are not exactly on point".

She had shrugged, and had let him go, only turning into the kitchen's general direction every time she heard a noise - and now here he is.

He's tall - so _unnecessary_ tall. His frame looks almost too big in the small kitchen, but he doesn't seem to mind, because he looks at home there, picking up ingredients from the cupboard and then proceeding to work with them as if he had spent his whole life doing just that. She wonders how many times he has cooked for Poe, and how many days he has spent in this apartment. She knows almost nothing about him - only what she has picked up from Poe -, but she is fascinated by this weird, awkward man who's currently diving into Poe's fridge searching for something.

"Hey," she says, entering the kitchen and catching his attention.

Ben half-turns into her direction, surprised, and blushes as he notices her standing there. From the moment she has let him in the house, opening the door for him, the tips of his ears have never lost their crimson hue, and he looks surprised to see her again, as if he had forgotten about her presence altogether.

"I'm Rey," she reminds him, when he doesn't immediately reply.

"I know," he replies, quietly. His voice is deep, but gentle, and his eyes linger on her for a moment, before he focuses again on his task, which is to say - toasts.  Still, his cheeks are flaming red and she's enthralled by it. "Let me guess, they're making out?"

She laughs and pretends to roll her eyes. "Yes, as usual," she replies, shaking her head as she stands there, in the doorway, looking at him - at the way he seems to tense under her gaze, but smiles at her, tentatively. He lets out a breathy exhale, and a boyish smile comes up on his face, making him look younger. "Mind if I join you here?"

He seems surprised, and his face turns crimson again, but he doesn't look irritated. "Not at all," he murmurs, glancing at her. "So, uh. How- how's the game going?"

Rey presses her lips together as she sits down at the kitchen table. "I, uh," she says just as eloquently, sparing a glance at the living room, where she can make out Poe and Finn's frames bathed in the TV light. "I actually have no idea. Not a big fan of sports".

Surprisingly, Ben laughs. His laughter reminds her of a thunder, deep and earth-shaking, but almost comforting, bringing the mercy of rain.

"Honestly, me neither," he admits, glancing in her direction and flashing her a small grin. His angular face melts again into a crooked smile, and she finds herself staring at him longer than she would have otherwise. "I'm here just because Poe kept pestering me about it. Said I had to get out of the house for once or something like that".

Rey laughs too. "That sounds like Poe," she replies, with an easy smile on her face. "How long have you known him for?"

Ben never stops working at the counter as he replies, so all she can see is his back and his broad shoulders, which turn to be a sight as fascinating as his face.

He shrugs, quietly. "I actually don't know," he says, and he sounds genuine, pensive, as if he was really trying to come up with an answer. "We've been friends since we were kids. Our parents knew each other and all that, you know, so it's hard to remember a time in which I didn't know Poe. I don't think there was such a time, honestly".

He sounds so - _affectionate_. Rey has heard a lot about Ben in the few months she has known Poe for - she has heard Poe going in details about adventures from his college days, and Ben, and their plans and their shenanigans, but she actually knew nothing about him, and she had always imagined Ben like some sort of younger Poe, all bright smiles and enthusiasm and lively energy. Instead, Ben is a quiet man with big, deep eyes and a crooked smile, a man whose response in social situations is, apparently, hide in the kitchen to make toasts.

She's surprised - but she likes it.

"That's nice," she says, in the end. She props her head on her hand as she watches him move around the kitchen, taking in his hair brushing his neck, his muscled back, his long legs. The sweater he's wearing is a little bit big on him, but even like this she can see how toned his arms look. He's _nice_. She hadn't expected it.

He hums in response. "What about you?" he asks her, turning a little into her direction to give her a questioning look. There's a genuine interest on his face, as he stares at her, and the corner of his lips tugs upwards in a gentle smile, and while Rey is not exactly new to all of this, to _friends_ in general, it's still with some sort of surprise that she realizes he's interested in what she has to say. "How long have you known Poe for?"

She gestures vaguely. "Oh, just a few months, I guess," she replies, shrugging. She glances behind to the living room, and Finn is currently nuzzling Poe's neck, sickening sweetly. She kinda hates them, but not really. "You know, since he and Finn started dating. We've been hanging out a few times. He's cool".

Ben nods, as if to agree with her. "He is. He's the only one who manages to stand me," he adds, and even if she can't see his face right now, as he's focusing on his task, she can _hear_ the smirk in his voice. It makes her stomach twist, and she's not sure it's about the pleasant scent coming from the stove, even if she must admit it smells amazing. "Here, have one".

He places the toast on a plate, and with a swift, graceful movement, he hands her the plate, looking at her with a small, gentle smile that should look out of place on his sharp features, but that instead makes him softer. His eyes follow her movements, and he stares at her expectantly as she watches the toast, and proceeds to bring it to her mouth.

"Oh my _God_ ," she moans as the first bite hits her tongue. She knows it could sound obscene, but she doesn't care, and she grabs another bite of the toast, under Ben's watchful gaze. "This is so good. I can't believe it, Poe never told me you were such a good cook. I might, like, kidnap you and ask you to cook for me forever".

To say that Ben blushes would be understatement - he literally turns crimson, the tips of his ears, peeking through his hair, looking so flushed she can feel the heat coming out of him. He awkwardly stands in front of the stove, bringing a hand to the base of his neck and nervously rubbing his skin.

"It's just a toast," he says, dismissively, but Rey isn't having it.

"It's amazing," she tells him, a little bit more forcefully than she intended to, but he doesn't seem to mind, because he's still flushed and red, but he's smiling, his lips curving again in that crooked, boyish grin she has glimpsed before. He looks even nicer like this, and she wonders if she can make him smile again. She'd like to. "I never had a toast as good as this, seriously. You are some sort of cooking wizard".

She's rewarded by a heartfelt laugh, and she stares at him in awe as he throws his head back, and little webs of lines appear at the corners of his eyes. He's quite a sight like this - he even forgets the awkwardness of a few seconds ago, and his body looks more at ease, as he leans against the counter, his longs legs splayed in front of him. Her stomach twists again.

"Well," he says, as he recovers, the ghost of that laugh still hanging from his lips. His breath is uneven, and he looks so _nice_ , deep, brown eyes sparkling in the static light of Poe's kitchen. "Next time I promise I'll make you something actually worthy of this reaction".

Then, he seems to realize what he's said, because he blushes again, and his eyes widen as he stares at her, mouth hanging open. He breathes in, then out, and then tries to speak. "I mean," he rushes to say. "I didn't mean to imply there would be another time, I- it was just-"

Rey smiles. "You don't have to," she reassures him. "But I'd like that".

He looks as surprised as she feels right now. It should be crazy - are they talking about dating? Does she want to date him? She doesn't even know his last name, for God's sake - she only knows he's _Ben_ and he's _tall_ and when he smiles something in her goes terribly soft and that she likes all too much the way he blushes and stutters on his words. It should scare her, but Ben glances her way with a shy, hopeful smile, and she can't bring herself to think about it.

"Really?" he asks her, as if he couldn't really believe his luck. He looks like a kid on Christmas day, and Rey can feel the _rightness_ of it in the way he stares at her.  

She nods, quietly. Her lips curve into another smile, and she feels her heart beat faster in her ribcage. "Really".

They spend the rest of the evening in the kitchen, the game completely forgotten, talking about everything and nothing, trivial, inconsequential things that make her heart flutter - he tells her about his work at the First Order and how he hates his coworkers, and his friendship with Poe. She learns that he's a few years younger than Poe, and that he has a minor in Art History, and all about that time they got so impossibly drunk while they were both in college. She talks about classes and her work at the garage and Finn and their cramped up apartment, describing him in vivid details all the reparations she had to do all by herself. He makes her another toast, and she eats it with gusto, far too happy to have actually decent food to munch on for once, and he smiles at her, his cheeks red, his eyes shining from what it looks like silent happiness. Rey feels like she's at home, which is silly, since she's in Poe's apartment with a man she doesn't really know, but she can't help it.

At some point, Finn and Poe wander into the kitchen, looking at the two of them as though they had forgotten about them, and staring at the plate sitting on the table. Finn frowns, and Rey barely manages to stifle a laughter.

"You missed the game," Poe announces, staring at Ben, and then glancing at Rey, as if he was deeply confused by their presence there, in his kitchen, eating toasts. "We won. Hey man, there are still some of your toasts? They're amazing".

After everything, as they're saying goodbye, Ben nervously stares at her, a hand at the back of his neck in what she has learned to recognize, in the span of one evening together, as an anxious gesture.

"I just wanted, uh," he tries to say, stuttering on his words. He closes his mouth, then he opens it again, looking at everything except for her at the moment. "I mean, you don't have to, but I'd like- I mean ... if you want-"

"Here's my number," she tells him, grabbing his phone from the pocket of his jeans - where he had put it a few minutes earlier - and memorizing her number with a boldness that surprises her too. "Call me," she adds, with a smirk.

Ben gapes at her, and then he nods.

*

**ben (18.09):** _Hey. I just wanted to ask if you still want to ... you know._

**rey (18.09):** _date? yes_

 **ben (18.11):** _Oh. Okay. Tomorrow? Would it be okay for you to come to my place? I do want to cook for you._

Rey stares at the words for a few seconds, thinking about Ben and his soft, gentle smile as he had handed her the toast, and the way he had blushed when she had complimented him. _I do want to cook for you_ , he says, and it's weird, because she never had someone to cook for her (Finn heating up instant ramen for her as she showers doesn't count), and she doesn't know how to feel about that.

It's new, but - she thinks about Ben's smile, and his genuine interest, and _yes_.

 **rey (18.12):** _sounds perfect_

*

True to his words, for their first date Ben cooks her an actual meal.

His apartment, which turns to be in the nicest part of the city, is smaller than she'd expected, but it's warm and cozy and utterly _Ben's,_ something about it that reminds her of this quiet, pensive man. There are books pretty much everywhere, both on the bookshelves and in piles around, and she has to dodge them to avoid falling face first on the floor, and there are a lot of paintings she doesn't recognize hanging on the walls. On a shelf, there's a picture of him and Poe on his graduation day - they both look young and carefree, shit-eating grins and messed up curls and a bright, glimmering energy about them. Rey can't help but smile at the sight.

Ben ushers her inside with the gentle, awkward smile she has learned to know by now. "Come in, let me take your coat," he tells her, as she shimmies out of her jacket and hands it to him, head almost turning from the effort of taking in everything at once.

This is all - so Ben. It's like walking right into his soul, the mix of pictures and books speaking volumes about him, and she wonders, with a pang, how many people he has let up here, if he ever has.

She clears her throat, trying not to get lost in her own thoughts. "I like your place," she says, in the end, flashing him a smile.

It's clear by now that Ben gets flustered easily, so she's not surprised when a faint pink starts to creep on his cheeks - instead, her heart starts hammering in her chest, so loudly she wonders if he can hear it, and she can't look away from him, as if deeply enthralled by his very existence.

"Thank you," he replies, quietly. He rubs the back of his neck, toys with the hem of his sweater, shoves his hands in the pockets of his jeans - all of this in the span of a few seconds, as he anxiously glances at her. There's some sort of nervous energy about him that clashes with the pensiveness of his gaze and the quietness of his soul, but it doesn't really seem out of place - just a different shade of him, another layer of the mystery that is Ben Solo. "I know it's not, like, much, and it's a mess and-"

"It's wonderful." She smiles again, more surely this time, and stretches out her hand to wrap her fingers around his wrist. It's not the first time they touch - he has awkwardly shaken her hand the first time at Poe's place, gaze fixed on his shoes and cheeks flaming red -, but it feels different now, and when he lowers his gaze to stare at her hand curved around his, he seems surprised, but pleased too. "I really like it. It feels like ... home".

And it's true. Not many things feel like home to her, a wandering child who never settled for long in one place, but this apartment, in the middle of a quiet little city - this feels like _home_ , and she likes it. It should scare her, but instead it feels warming and pleasant, as soothing as a hot cup of tea after a long day.

Ben blushes again, then tugs gently at her hand, not bothering to letting her go. Rey likes this too - his hand feels nice in hers, his fingers fitting perfectly between her own, and she doesn't want to let him go either.

"Come on," he says, quietly, guiding her towards the kitchen. "I'm making pasta".

She chuckles, following him and intertwining their fingers more firmly. "Now, you're spoiling me," she comments, as they step in his small kitchen. "Is this your plan? To seduce me with your cooking skills?"

The blush doesn't really leave his cheeks, but his lips curve into that full, boyish smile that she has glimpsed before and that turns her heart into a stuttering mess.

"Oh, no," he says, faking concern. "You got me there".

A giggle escapes her lips before she even realizes, and it's so heartbreakingly easy to fall in steps with him, as if she had known him in a previous life, twin stars orbiting around each other since the beginning of time. "Well," she says, a smile as broad as his on her lips. "It's working".

His thumb brushes against her knuckles, tenderly and slowly as if he was testing it, but he doesn't lose the grin. "At least wait until you've tasted it".

After that, she sits down at the table - she tries to protest and say she can help him (though she has never cooked anything more than a burnt toast in her life), but Ben flashes her a stern glance, reminding her she's a guest, and she stays put - and watches him work. The table has already been set - an elegant tablecloth, fine, porcelain plates and a bottle of red wine standing in front of her.

Ben works with the same ease at the stove, as if he had spent his whole life doing just that, and, just as last time, she props her head on her hand and watches him work with rapt fascination, studying his practiced movements.

He's still so _unreasonably_ tall, even more so in his tiny kitchen, and Rey's gaze falls on his long, long legs more often than she'd like to admit. He looks terribly nice like this - his gaze focused on his task, his hands cutting down something she can't see, the effortlessness of all of it. He radiates the confidence he's usually missing, and Rey is captivated by the duality of him - by his awkwardness and his ease, the strange mix of adorable and sexy that makes her heart skip a few beats.

He talks while he stirs something in a pot, his voice carrying to her - he tells her all about his day at work and the irritating, ginger excuse of a human being that he calls Hux. Rey giggles at his imitation of a British accent, and gapes at him for a moment when he asks her about her day, as if he was really interested. She tells him all about her classes, and the awful dude who felt the need to correct her even if she was right only because she's a woman in a male-dominated field, and how that put her off for the rest of the day even as she walked to work.

"He's an idiot," Ben says without missing a beat, his back turned on her as he works away his cooking magic. "You're definitely more competent than him. Don't let the assholes get you down, you're great and you're going to be way more successful than them. Here, have a taste".

He sounds so _sure_ of it. Before she can reply to that or even try to make sense of his words in her mind, he spins around and offers her a spoonful of something she can't name or even identify, for the matter. It's weirdly intimate as he feeds her, and her cheeks turn crimson, but she lets him do it, and licks her lips as he pulls away the spoon.

Ben never takes his eyes off her and he has an expectant look about him as he waits for her judgment. "How's that?"

Rey licks her lips again, and she can barely hold back a moan because it tastes so _good_. "Perfect," she replies, a little bit breathless. He gives her his broad, bright grin again, and turns to work again at the stove, leaving her stunned. "How did you learn how to cook so well?"

His face turns as red as the sauce he appears to be stirring in a pan and he shrugs, silently. Something in Rey goes even more softer as she watches him awkwardly try to come up with an answer.

"I don't know," he murmurs, softly. "I guess ... well, even when I used to live with my parents, they were never around, so I had to learn how to look after myself".

His tone is blank, emotionless, but she can pinpoint the feelings stirring just beneath the surface of his composure, gnawing away at his heart, so she tries to distract him as best as she can. "Well, you're really good. If everything else tastes just as good, I'm keeping you forever".

Ben chuckles, as quietly as he does everything else, but she can see the hint of red on the tips of his ears, and a glimpse of his flushed face as he turns to grab a wooden spoon.

"You know," he says, his tone deliberately casual - too much, for him. Rey's eyebrow quirks up and she tilts her head to the side, studying him. "I've never cooked for anyone else. I mean, I have made something for Poe every once in a while, but- never a whole meal. But I like it, cooking for you".

She doesn't know how to reply to that, because it feels - so _big_. They barely know each other, and they have seen each other twice, but it's all so natural and easy, and she can't help but smile and say, "I like it too".

When everything's ready, Ben turns off the stove, grabs her plate and gently shoves a frankly obscene quantity of pasta in it. Rey's stomach twist pleasantly, as the smell hits her again, and once again she finds herself on the cusp of moaning, because it's so _good_ , and she never had someone to make her pasta before.

They finally sit down to eat, Ben awkwardly smiling from his side of the table as she tentatively brings a forkful of pasta to her mouth. It's like a sacred experience - the taste of it explodes gently in her mouth and this time she can't help but outright _moan_ as she bites down on it. He blushes furiously, coughing and taking a sip of his wine to mask the fact that he's probably choking on his bite, and Rey is so surprised she can't even feel embarrassed.

"Oh my god, it's so _good_ ," she almost whimpers, staring at her plate and then at Ben in awe. "Consider me seduced. I'm yours, utterly and totally yours".

He blushes even more, his face turning crimson under her gaze, and takes another sip of his wine.

"It's just pasta," he tries to say, dismissively, but it's clear that he's pleased and a little smile comes up on his lips. The red on his cheeks doesn't retreat, and it makes his moles stand out darker against his complexion and - he looks even nicer like this. Why is everything he does so fascinating? That can't be right.

"Shut up," she murmurs back. "It's amazing. I've never tasted something as good as this, you're seriously a wizard".

His low chuckle makes her heart thunder in her chest, and his face breaks into that big, luminous grin she's become so fond of in so little time.

"I've never met someone like you," he confesses, after a moment. She's bringing another forkful of pasta to her mouth, so she barely raises her eyebrows, confused. "You seem, I don't know, to enjoy food so much. It's good, I don't mean to say it's not, I'm sorry I'm just bad at words. I find it amazing-" he rushes to say, blushing even more under her gaze. "It's just new".

She knows what he means, and she can feel her cheeks redden too, as she lowers her gaze to the plate in front of her. "I like food," she says, nonchalantly - her standard reaction when it comes to the parts of her life she doesn't like to share so willingly. Then, because he opened up about his parents even when he didn't have to and because she really, _really_ likes him, she sighs, and raises her eyes, flashing him a small, uncertain smile. "There wasn't plenty of it around, where I grew up".

Ben frowns, his brow knit together in confusion, but he doesn't press her. It's clear that he wants to know more about her, and he'd like to ask her about it, but Rey appreciates the way he's staying silent, his lips pressed together, only his deep eyes betraying a hint of concern as they linger on her.

She has never told this story to anyone - Finn grew up just like her and there wasn't any need to explain to him what she went through, and her relationship with Poe, while affectionate and vital, has never been quite as deep. But she likes Ben, and that's what makes it even harder.

"I grew up in the foster system. My guardian wasn't ... well, wasn't very kind with me. The only thing I remember from my childhood is the hunger, when he used to starve me out," she explains, flatly, as if it were a tale that didn't really belong to her. "So everytime I got to eat, I just ... wolfed it down, because I didn't know when I was going to eat next".

Her gaze automatically flickers to her hands, because she can't bear to look at Ben's face right now - because what if she'll read disgust, or, even worse, pity on it? She's not sure she could stomach it, not from him.

"It's been a while, but sometimes I still forget there will be a next meal," she explains, toying with her fork. Then, she breathes in, and out, and presses her lips together in a tight smile as she glances into Ben's direction, knowing she will have to face him, eventually. Better on her terms, at least. "Conditioned response, I guess".

She expects - well, anything. Repulsion, loathing, pity, things she had to learn how to deal with the hard way in her life. But instead, when she meets his gaze, Ben's face is as soft and gentle as always, his eyes earnest and this almost breaks her. He's worrying his bottom lip between his teeth, and she can read him so easily - the concern, the sadness in the back of his eyes, and a quiet sort of anger that he's masking well, but comes up anyway in the tense set of his shoulders. There's no pity on his face and her stomach drops.

"Forget it," she says, quickly, waving her hand around as if to swat away a fly. Ben doesn't look away from her. "I know this is not, like ... first date kind of stuff. I'm sorry-"

He's surprisingly graceful and quick - one moment, he's staring at her from across the table, and the next he's grasping her hand in his, lacing their fingers together and stroking her knuckles with his thumb. He seems to realize how soothing this is, how much she likes it, because he keeps on caressing her skin, his gaze fixed on her face.

"I promise you," he tells her, quietly but with a fierce determination in the back of his eyes. "I will cook for you anytime you'd like".

A nervous chuckle escapes her lips. "You really don't have-"

"I'm not saying it because I _have_ to," he interrupts her. The expression on his face is so earnest, so intense and raw that Rey feels her heart in her throat as if it wanted to claw its way out of her, and she wants to say something, but she is not sure she even remembers how to speak. "I'm saying it because I _want_ to. I told you, I never cooked for anyone, but I like to cook for you. It's ... nice".

He squeezes her hand, and her lips curve into a tentative smile, as she blinks a few times. If Ben notices she's on the verge of crying, he's kind enough not to mention it, and keeps on stroking the back of her hand with his thumb, tracing small circles on her skin, with all the tenderness he can muster.

"Thank you," she says, in the end, when she feels like her voice is not going to break anytime soon. "Well, now you know the way to my heart is definitely through my stomach".

His laugh is as deep and infectious as she remembers, and she's fascinated by the way his shoulders shake as he giggles, his long hair brushing against his neck, his lips curving into that crooked smile that makes her turn into a lovestruck teenager.

"I'm glad to know that," he whispers, when his laughter dies down. He's still smiling, but there's a burning intensity in his eyes that has Rey captivated. "Because I really like you".

She squeezes his hand back, with no hesitation. "I really like you, too".

Afterwards, she helps him with the dishes. She washes them and he dries them, and they work so perfectly together it almost feels like they've done this before. Rey likes this quiet atmosphere - standing next to him in his small kitchen, laughing and joking with him about trivial things, glancing his way and meeting his eyes, already set on her. It feels - _domestic_. She never had a home, never considered the countless apartments she has lived in as such, but this feeling - this warmth in her bones, this fluttering thing in her chest, this feels like home, and she finally feels at peace.

He walks her back to her place - she tries to protest, but he doesn't let her get far with it, and helps her with her jacket, before grabbing his coat and together they venture in the streets. She intertwines their fingers after a few seconds debate, and he's so surprised, but also so _happy_ about it - crooked smile and red cheeks, her favorite mix. They walk hand in hand like teenagers, and when they reach Rey's building she's smiling so much the muscles of her face hurt.

It feels nice.

"Rey," he murmurs, his voice lower, deeper. His thumb is still brushing against her knuckles, as if he had learned how much she likes it, and she sighs, contentedly, as he tugs at her hand and makes her turn into his direction. "I really want to kiss you. Can I?"

Her words are a breathless little sound. "Yes, please".

She doesn't know who moves first - if she's the first to raise to her tiptoes or if he's the first to bend down, but she twines her arms around his neck, and his hands find their way to her hips, and he's kissing her and the world starts spinning. His lips are softer than she'd expected them to be, and when her hands wind up in his hair he makes a sweet little noise against her mouth, something between a whimper and gasp. He's gentle but also so _eager_ , kissing her so sweetly it makes her whole body shiver, and she's never been kissed like this - like she means something, like he's desperate and trembling under her hands just because she's there and she's touching him.

When he pulls away, he rests his forehead against hers and smiles at her - the tender smile she suspects she's starting to fall for already. "Goodnight," he murmurs, his voice barely a whisper, his breath ghosting over her lips.

She smiles too, fingers wrapped around his strands. "Goodnight," she echoes, before pulling him down in another kiss.

They try to say goodnight for fifteen minutes, before either of them makes an actual effort to pull away. Rey leaves another kiss to the corner of his mouth, and watches him go, a dumbstruck expression on his face, with a smile on her lips.

*

 **rey (1.03 AM):** _hey, i just wanted to say ... thank u i guess_

 **ben (1.04 AM):** _For what?_

 **rey (1.04 AM):** _i don't know ... for listening to me. for not making it weird. for the pasta. your guess._

 **ben (1.05 AM):** _You're very welcome, Rey. Thank you for granting me the privilege of cooking for you._

It should be ridiculous - who even says something like that in real life? It should be cringe-worthy and embarrassing, but instead, she feels something fuzzy and warm in her chest, and she can't help but blush, hiding her face in her pillow. She groans, muffling it against the fabric of her pillow case, and she knows she's got it _bad_.

 **rey (1.06 AM):** _you're a nerd_

 **ben (1.06 AM):** _Yes, but you already said you like me, so. No take back._

**rey (1.07 AM):** _as i said, nerd_

*

Ben, Rey finds out, is a man who keeps his promises, and he cooks for her at any given chance. He makes her the most delicious dishes she has ever tasted on their dates, bakes cookies for her to bring to class, packs her a bag full of _everything_ when Rey comes back to her place so she can basically live off it for the next two days.

She's starting to think he's spoiling her. She tells him as much, and he just laughs, stealing a kiss from her lips and telling her it's what she deserves. It's hard to argue with him about it, when he says it with such a convincing tone and a deep, honest intensity in his eyes, and so she doesn't, and limits herself to steal a cookie from him with a smirk.

They start to spend their days off together, hanging in his apartment because hers is way too small and cramped up and definitely not Finn and Poe-free for it. She doesn't mind it - in fact, she loves Ben's place, the coziness of all of it, the countless books lying around, the way it speaks about him. Sometimes they lie on the couch and she asks him about one of the paintings hanging in front of them, and he's all too happy to talk about it, smiling so broadly her chest goes tight. He leans on her, angling his (frankly obscenely tall) body so that he can rest his head upon her shoulder, and she stays there, her fingers playing with his hair, eyes drifting shut as he basks in her affection and tells her all about Paris at the beginning of last century and how the Impressionists changed the whole prospect on art.

It feels dangerously like home - like she has finally found the place she belongs to.

*

 **rey (9.02 AM):** _i can't make it today. i have just been called to work, apparently they need me. i'm sorry :((_

 **ben (9.03AM):** _Don't worry, sweetheart, I understand. Have a good day at work, and I'll be there if you need me. Call me when you get off._

The whole morning passes by like a whirlwind - she spends all of it under the hood of a car, emerging every now and then just to breath (or, as Rose puts it, _whine_ ) and by the time lunch breaks arrives, she realizes she has not packed lunch at all. She knows she could just walk a little and get whatever she wants from the store down the street, but she's already so _tired_ and she's supposed  to be with Ben right now, in his small kitchen, watching him work his magic at the stove and joking with him about his hair getting too long. She likes when he lets her help him tying it back so it doesn't get in the way.

She knows it's stupid to be _grumpy_ about it, but she can't help it. All she wanted to do was to be with Ben today, and instead here she is, covered in grease and staring at her feet and without even her lunch. Her stomach rumbles, as if to remind her she needs to get something before her break is over.

She crashes on her bench with a sigh, determined to look as pissed off as possible, as she hears Rose talking with someone - probably another client. Her voice carries to Rey, and it sounds weirdly high-pitched, a tone of surprise that Rey has never heard before. She frowns in confusion, but before she can even think about investigating, Rose pops in the room with the biggest smirk Rey has ever seen on her face, and stares at her wriggling her eyebrows.

"There's someone for you," she announces, cheekily.

Rey's brain is having trouble processing the words, so she frowns again. "Someone for me?"

"Yeah, Mr Tall, Dark and Handsome?" Rose replies, without missing a beat, the same smirk hanging from her lips. "He's in the waiting room. Listen, if you don't want him, I'll take him".

She bolts out of the room in no time, followed by Rose's giggle, but she doesn't mind because her heart is thundering away in her chest, and when she reaches the waiting room - she's _breathless_ , because Ben's there, in his dark jeans and warm sweater, and he's looking at her with a small, hesitant smile and his usual blush on his cheeks, the one that never leaves him even if they've been dating for _weeks_.  

Rey is suddenly aware of the fact that she's covered in grease, her overall is probably filthy and she must look like hell, but as she enters the room, he seems to have glimpsed Heaven, because his face breaks into an awestruck grin and his eyes shine and he's _there_ , at her workplace, and Rey can't still process the fact that this is real, this is happening.

It doesn't matter.

"Ben!" she exclaims, running up to him. She's almost on the cusp of hugging him, when she remembers the state of her clothes right now, and so she takes a step back, staring at him with a flush on her cheeks. Despite her confusion, she can't help the smile spreading on her lips. "Sorry, I'm filthy. What are you doing _here_?"

He brings a hand at the back of his neck, rubbing it nervously. "I thought ... uh, it's-well, cheesy, but, like- you sounded like you were in a rush this morning and I think I know you a little bit by now and- well, I thought you hadn't had the chance to pack your lunch and you would be hungry now, so ..." He blushes, and hands her a paper bag, looking at everything except for her. "I made you a sandwich".

Her fingers curve around the bag as if by instinct, while she tries to make sense of his words in her brain. She's still reeling after the sight of him in the garage's old, dusty waiting room, so it takes her far longer than necessary.

"You ..." She frowns, staring at him, who's currently checking out his sleeve as if he had just realized his sweater had one. "You drove all the way here, on your day off, just to bring me a sandwich?" she asks him, in the end. At this, Ben practically stops breathing and the tips of his ears turn crimson, as they peek through the disheveled mess the winter wind has made of his beautiful hair.

He runs a hand through said mess of hair, nervously, then darts a glance in her direction as if scared of seeing her reaction. His lips curve into another tentative smile, and Rey's heart stutters in her chest. "Is it weird?"

"It's _crazy_ ," she replies, quietly. She places the bag on a counter, then stalks towards him until she's right in front of him. She _aches_ to touch him so badly, but she doesn't want to sooth his pristine clothes, so she keeps her hands by her side and shakes her head, disbelief on her face. "Ben, you didn't have to-"

A low, tender chuckle escapes his lips as he stretches out his hand, pulling a strand of hair away from her face and tucking it beneath her ear. "I thought it was clear that I'm not doing this because I _have_ to".

The way he says it - so effortlessly, so naturally, so _easily_ , as if he hadn't been stuttering on his words up until ten seconds ago - is what turns her breathless, shuts down her brain for good and makes her grab him by his stupid sweater and pull him down in a kiss. He's surprised to say the least and gasps against her mouth, but he's quick to wrap his arms around her and he kisses her and kisses her, and it's like this God awful day had never happened. She feels at peace in his arms, she feels like this is making things right and it should be crazy, but somehow it isn't.

"I'm sorry, I got grease all over your beautiful sweater, I'm-" she tries to say, when she pulls away to breathe, but Ben silences her with his lips, and it doesn't matter anymore.

They spend her brief lunch break together in the waiting room. She eats his sandwich - it tastes as good and amazing as usual, which doesn't surprises her one bit -, and he watches her with a little satisfied smile on his lips. He drops a kiss to her temple when she rests her forehead against his shoulder, and it feels surprisingly like home.

*

 **ben (2.45 PM):** _Want to come over tonight?_

 **rey (2.46 PM):** _it depends. are u cooking?_

The three dots flicker on screen as he writes back, and she can imagine him pretending to roll his eyes at her words, faking annoyance. Something warm takes hold of her heart, and she feels like someone had just put a big, soft blanket around her frame.

 **ben (2.48 PM):** _Yes. I'm making homemade pizza. You coming?_

 **rey (2.50 PM):** _homemade pizza? forget it, i'm already there_

 **ben (2.50 PM):** _Sometimes I get the feeling you date me only for my cooking skills._

Rey stifles her giggle with her hand, as she reads his text, and the same warmth from before envelopes her. It should surprise her to realize it's all about _Ben_ \- after all, she has ever felt this way about anyone else. But, instead, she welcomes these feelings with a smile, and a thundering heart. It feels _good_.

 **rey (2.51 PM):** _don't forget your amazing personality_

 **ben (2.52 PM):** _Sap._

*

Ben kisses her like he has been waiting for this moment his whole life, and he's trying to savor it. His lips are soft and gentle and when they trail down to press worshipful kisses to the column of her throat, she gasps, her eyes fluttering shut out of their own accord.

It's slow and tortuous and she feels on fire. The familiar, welcome weight of his body presses her into the mattress, the fabric of his sweater scratching pleasantly against her bare breasts, and when his hand finally, finally travels lower, brushing against the hem of her skirt, she lets out a keening sound, parting her legs for him.

Ben leaves a chaste kiss to the outline of her breast. "Is this okay?"

She nods, eagerly, her hands flying to his face to bring him down in another bruising kiss. "Yes, please, please," she whimpers against his mouth, as his fingers slowly trail up her thigh, the contact burning a layer into her skin. "I need- I need ..."

He doesn't let her struggle with her words. Instead, he kisses her deeply, teeth coming to tease at her bottom lip while his fingers trace patterns against her inner thigh. She squirms under him, aching to feel him where she wants him the most.

"I've got you, sweetheart," he murmurs, his voice rough and low against her mouth. "I've got you".

Another gasp escapes her lips as he finally hooks his fingers into her panties and drags them down her legs, dropping them onto the floor without even looking. She's left only in her skirt, parted legs and heavy breaths, and when his fingers come to graze against her clit she lets out a low moan, throwing her head back on his pillow.

He teases her, slowly, as if to study her reactions, drawing small circles around her clit. "Ben", she whimpers, bucking her hips onto his hand. She has her eyes closed, but she can feel him exhale, deeply, and press another kiss to her breast, before his fingers slide down to circle around her entrance. " _Please_ ," she adds, eyes fluttering open just slightly, just to look at him.

He's staring at her, with his lips pressed against her chest and his eyes full of tenderness, and it feels - _breathtaking_. She has never felt quite as wanted and loved as she feels now, with his eyes on her and his fingers slowly, _oh so slowly_ easing into her. She parts her lips in a soundless moan, and he kisses her through it. He kisses her as he starts to move his fingers ever so slowly, he kisses her when his thumb comes to tease her clit and she gasps against his mouth, he kisses her as she rocks her hips, clutching at his shoulders when she starts to tremble around him. He kisses her through her orgasm, and Rey goes boneless into his arms, letting him soothe her with tender words and light kisses all over her face.

"That was-" he says, and he sounds as breathless as she is right now, eyes fluttering shut as she falls down on the bed again. "That was beautiful, you're beautiful. Thank you, thank you".

He litters her face, her neck, her chest in small little kisses, and Rey just rests there, more than happy to bask in the after-glow of the orgasm and in his affection. She feels the mattress dip down a little bit, and he drops next to her on the bed, an arm around her middle, his face buried in the place where her neck meets her shoulders, one of his legs swung over hers.

She can feel him straining against her thigh, but he makes no move of urging her. He just keeps on kissing every inch of skin he manages to reach, as if it were enough for him, and murmurs low, gentle praises that make her shiver, and okay, she didn't know it was a thing for her, but apparently it is and she wants him to tell her how beautiful she is again and again and again, possibly while he fucks her silly into the mattress.

With a silent giggle, she rolls on the side, sliding one of her legs between his, her knee coming to nudge against his cock. He gasps, surprised, and she smiles as her hands slowly travel down his chest to grab the hem of his sweater and tug at it.

"This-" she huffs, frustrated. "This needs to go".

Ben seems to be too dumbstruck to object, and he rises off the bed only to help her get rid of the offensive garment, then he falls back on the mattress as she comes to straddle him. His eyes are blown wide, and his lips are parted, but he can't seem to be able to think about _words_ , right now.

Rey smirks, lowering just enough to press a kiss to his chest. The room is dark, but she can see him all the same and he looks - _beautiful_. His chest is dotted with moles just like his face, scattered all around his skin like stars in a constellation, and he's so, so breathtaking, a faint pink hue covering his cheeks and the tips of his ears and even his neck. She rocks just slightly, and he lets out a deep, throaty moan, staring at her in disbelief, as if he couldn't believe his luck.

Rey feels the same, right now. She can't believe she's got this wonderful, gorgeous man under her, staring at her like she's made of stars. She cants her hips again, feeling him harden even more between her legs, and a moan escapes her lips as her hands come to rest on his chest, scrambling for purchase.

His hands fly to her hips, but he doesn't press her into him. Instead, he stills her and traces small patters over the fabric of her skirt. "We don't have to-" He blushes even more, and she can feel his hands tremble where they hold her. He's so _eager_ ,  shivering and shaking just because he wants her, but he's still holding back because of _her_ and she's left gaping at him, because no one has ever treated her like this - like she means something. "You don't have to feel pressured to-"

"I want to," she replies, earnestly. One of her hand comes to brush against his face, pushing a few strands of hair away from it, and she smiles as he stares at her, the same surprised expression on his beautiful features. Her fingers trail down to follow the curve of his gorgeous lips and he kisses her fingertips with tenderness. "I want _you_ ".

Another blush spreads from his face to the edge of his chest, and oh, _oh_ , how much she loves him for it. His hands come to rest on the zipper of her skirt, pulling it down, and then she's scrambling off him just to divests herself of the last piece of clothing.

"You're so beautiful," he murmurs, staring at her with a tender smile on his lips and an awestruck expression of his face.

She smiles too, blushing. "You are, too," she whispers back. She leans in to kiss him, needing to know what that smile tastes like, as her nimble fingers work open the button of his jeans and start tugging at them, pulling them down his legs.

He laughs on her mouth at her eagerness and helps her getting rid of his jeans and boxers at the same time, kicking them off. And then, _then_ , he stares at her with the same awe in his eyes as he flips them over, and he's resting between her parted legs.

One hand comes to rest on her hipbone, while the other brushes against her face with the gentlest touch. "You're sure?" he asks her, watchful eyes and concerned expression, but she just nods, bringing her hand upon his and trailing their joined hands down, to rest on her thundering heart. "Wait- let me grab a condom".

She bites down on her lips, staring at him with uncertainty in her eyes. "I'm on the pill and I'm clean," she murmurs, her cheeks flaming red under his eyes. He doesn't reply, and stares at her in disbelief, mouth hanging open. "We don't have to- I'm just saying-"

She never gets to finish that sentence. He rushes down to kiss her, desperate and enthusiast at the same time. "Fuck, Rey," he whispers, reverently. "Are you sure?" he asks her again, his eyes never leaving her face. She nods again, her fingers tracing patterns against his hand.

Ben seems to understand, because he intertwines their fingers over her heart and slowly, slowly pushes home. She parts her lips, but no sound comes out of them as he bottoms out, and Ben lowers just enough to kiss her chest, her neck, her collarbones.

"You feel so good," he murmurs, his voice broken, his grip on her hip tightening just a little bit. "Sweetheart, you're amazing. You're so _perfect_ , Rey".

She moans at that, and she moans as he starts to rock his hips, ever so gently. His lips come to rest against her ear, and he tells her how beautiful, how stunning, how perfect she is for him, murmuring low praises at every thrust, and reminding her how good she feels around him, as if he had been waiting his whole life for this. Rey's hand comes to clutch at his shoulder again as her hips roll against his almost of their own accord, and he holds her through it, kissing her cheek, nibbling slightly at her lobe, telling her how _good_ she is.

"Ben," she pants, her face buried into his neck, her back arching off the mattress. "I need-"

He hushes her with a gentle kiss, nipping at her bottom lip and drawing a small, wrecked moan from her. "I know, sweetheart, I know".

His hand sneaks between their bodies, right where they're joined, and he starts to tease her clit again with feather-like touches, turning her into a whimpering mess. She begs him, or at least she thinks she does, but she's not sure she's even making sense right now, as his fingers circle her clit without applying the pressure she needs. Her legs come to encircle his waist, pulling him even closer, and she cries out when he finally starts tumbling her clit in earnest, his hips rocking a little bit faster now.

He presses a kiss to the corner of her mouth, her skin flushed hot under his lips. "I need you to come for me," he whispers, sounding as out of breath and desperate as she is. "Can you do that? Can you come for me?"

He punctuates his words with a flick of his thumb against her clit and she nods, screwing her eyes shut. "Yes, yes, please," she whimpers, her nails biting into his skin. "I'm so _close_ , Ben-"

His lips trail down to kiss her collarbones. "You're so good, Rey," he tells her, every word accompanied by a sharp thrust. She feels on fire, like every nerve of her body is tingling, and something is coiling up deep inside her. "You're so _good_. I like you so much, sweetheart".

Maybe it's his words, maybe it's the way he says it, maybe it's the flick of his thumb against her clit, but what was building inside of her finally snaps and she falls apart beneath him with his name on her lips, her back arching off the bed and her hands buried into his hair. Her whole body shivers as she comes down and he thrusts once, twice and then he pulses inside her, murmuring something about how much he likes her, how beautiful she is, thanking her for this, thanking her for _everything_.

She wants to tell him she's the one who's supposed to thank him - for letting her feel like she has a home for the first time in her life. But she feels warm and dazed and _safe_ , and words are completely forgotten as he pulls out of her to drop on the bed next to her. An arm comes to encircle her waist, and he pulls her to him.

He nuzzles his nose against her cheek and she lets a giggle escape her lips as she turns into his arms. She glances at him, and he's already staring at her, smiling brightly, looking at her like she hangs the sky.

"You're amazing," he whispers, as if it were a secret between the two of them.

She smiles too, sliding closer. His palm trails down, and rests against the small of her back, protectively, and she's never felt as safe as she feels right now in his arms, as if nothing bad could happen to her ever again. She has never felt this way, and she wants to tell him, but she can't find the right words, so she just lets his warmth envelope her, nestling against his body.

"No," she whispers back, leaning in. "You are".

She kisses him, and he turns pliant and soft, telling how much he likes her between kisses. It feels like _belonging_ , it tastes like _home_.

After, as they rest under his sheets, he pulls her into him, and Rey buries her face in the crook of his neck, enjoying his warmth and his closeness. His lips brush against her forehead. "Stay here tonight?"

She just nods, burrowing into him.

 _Funny_ , she thinks as she starts to drift asleep into his arms, _as if she wanted to be anywhere else._

*

The next morning she wakes up to an empty bed and a pleasant scent coming from the kitchen. She burrows into the pillow as she slowly cracks one eye open, taking in the sunlit room full of books and paintings, the soft sheets she's wrapped into, and the pile of clothes resting on the chair in front of her.

It takes her a moment to remember she's at Ben's place, and those are her clothes. She rolls into the bed, but his side is empty, though still warm, and she sighs, fighting the urge to wrap her arms around his pillow because it smells like him. She doesn't have to do this, she tells herself, he's probably just in the kitchen, a few feet away, cooking the breakfast she can practically smell even from here. Her mouth waters, but something in her turns even softer, because - because Ben is cooking her breakfast, and nobody has ever done something like this for her.

It's a lot of first things, with him. She likes it.

Lazily, she raises from the bed and grabs her underwear, which is resting on top of the pile of clothes. Apparently, Ben has folded everything nicely and put it on his chair, and she feels her lips curve into a small smile and warmth spreading through her bones. Instead of pulling on her clothes, through, she rummages through the room until she finds one of his t-shirts, just for the sake of it. It's pretty big on her and it falls past her thighs, but it smells like him and it makes her feel safe, as cliché as it sounds.

She paddles towards the kitchen, following the scent she can't identify and the few noises coming from the room, smiling already.

Ben is there, clad only in his black boxers, and he's working at the stove with the usual ease, humming something under his breath. His hair brushes against his neck, and he looks glorious like this, as the first gentle rays of sun shine on him. Rey takes a moment to stand in the doorway, leaning against the doorframe just to enjoy the view of this beautiful man, with his muscled shoulders and his powerful thighs, humming a song and cooking breakfast just for her, and her heart does a weird dance in her chest because she can't still believe her luck - she still can't believe how she got there, how she got into this apartment that speaks of home, after having wandered for so long.

She shakes her head, because she knows those thoughts are useless now, and she smiles as she walks toward him, taking advantage of a moment in which he's stepping away from the stove. He's setting up a tray, a huge pile of pancakes sitting on a plate, and a glass of orange juice standing next to it.

Her heart twists pleasantly in her ribcage.

She wraps her arms around his chest, pressing a kiss into his shoulder blades, keeping him there, against her. He lets out a little yelp and she laughs, quietly, muffling her chuckle against his skin.

"Morning," she says, her voice thick with emotion, even if she tries to hide it.

He whines a little bit as he pulls away enough to turn into her arms and face her.

"You should be asleep," he tells her, pressing his lips together. His hand comes to rest on her face, toying with a strand of her hair as he stares down at her with his puppy eyes. "I wanted to bring you breakfast in bed".

Her heart stutters again in her chest and the words _You didn't have to_ are on the tip of her tongue, but she bites them back as he stares at her with a little, adorable pout that makes him look younger than he actually is. He's still as breathtaking in the gentle morning light as he was last night, and she raises on her tiptoes to kiss him deeply, wrapping her arms around his neck.

"Well," she murmurs on his mouth. "You can do it next time".

The look of pure happiness on his face is definitely worth it. There's a childlike wonder in the back of his eyes, and his crooked grin is back on his face, and Rey - Rey feels like _everything_ , like her chest is so full of warmth and love it could almost explode from all of it.

"I definitely will," he announces, lowering just a little bit so he can press a kiss to her forehead. His hands travel down, warm palms brushing against the small of her back, and his fingers toy with the hem of her - well, his - shirt. He pulls away with a confused frown, staring down at her. "Is this mine?"

She bites down on her bottom lip, looking at him with apprehension.

"Yeah, it smelled like you," she tells him, quietly, a faint pink hue tinting her cheeks as she burrows in the far too big shirt. When he doesn't immediately reply and just stands there, his eyes fixed on her as if studying her, her heart stops for a moment. "Is that a problem? I'm sorry I should have ask-"

His hands come to cup her face and pull her into a bruising kiss, his teeth nibbling at her bottom lip just slightly, turning her into a whimpering mess in his arms. She laces her arms around his shoulders, toying with the extremely soft hair at the base of his neck and he hums into the kiss, a contented little sound that seems almost like a purr.

When he pulls away, he doesn't let her go, his arms coming to wrap around her body, both gentle and protective and Rey is more than happy to bask in his affection, letting the warmth of his body seep through her bones and remind her, for the first time in her life, what it feels like to be loved.  

"You look amazing in this," he whispers, nuzzling his nose against her cheek, making her giggle at the simple, fond gesture. "In fact, I think you should always wear my clothes".

A laughter bubbles in her chest, genuine and blissful. "That would be really impractical". He laughs too, and she pulls him down in another kiss, tasting the laughter off his lips, enjoying the simple ease of the morning, the way he pulls her close to his chest, the way his hand moves up and down her spine, as if to soothe her. "Thank you," she whispers, then, on his mouth.

Ben doesn't lose his grin, but he raises an eyebrow, confused. "For what?"

Her fingers wrap around his hair, toying with it as she rests against his chest, and he presses a kiss to her forehead again, as if to encourage her.

She hums softly. "For making me breakfast. You're amazing".

It's immediate - he blushes, the heat coming off his body in waves, enveloping her as he's doing with his arms. She's got her head buried in the crook of his neck, lips pressed against his skin, but she can _feel_ the way his face turns crimson, the tips of his ears burning, his hands trembling a little where they rest on her hips, and it never ceases to amaze her - how easily he can whisper the most intimate things, but be still embarrassed because of a compliment.

Her heart twists a little bit in a pleasant way, and she burrows even closer into him, as if she could nestle her body into his. It feels so good, to let his arms wrap around her - she never allowed anyone to make her feel like she needed protection, because she never did, not even when she was a kid. But it feels nice to let Ben envelope and protect her, not because he doesn't think she can take care of herself, but just because he wants to, because he _cares_ about her.

It's still so new and raw, but she likes it. She tries to show it by pressing a kiss to his pulse point, and Ben shivers in her arms.

"You haven't even tasted it yet," he tries to say, with a little chuckle, his lips brushing against her hairline, warm and affectionate as usual. "Maybe my pancakes suck and you'll get food poisoning".

She moves away a little bit just to stare at him, the corners of her mouth tugging upwards in a smile.

"First of all, I don't buy it. I'm sure your pancakes will be as amazing as usual and I'll be ruined for anything else," she tells him, surely, and he blushes even more, his cheeks adorably pink, his gaze fixed on everything except for her, his fingers nervously toying with the hem of her shirt. "And it doesn't matter. Even if they sucked, that's still breakfast. Nobody has ever done that for me, you're definitely spoiling me".

The way he stares at her is so full of tenderness her chest kind of hurts at the sight, but a good kind of hurt - the one that makes you smile and bless the turn of events that has brought you there. His face breaks into his usual smile, bright and boyish and beautiful, and she can't believe her luck, and she feels so full of love right now it's almost surprising he can't read it off her face.

"Well," he murmurs, nuzzling again against her cheek, an usual gesture that has her heart hammering crazily just because it feels so domestic. "That's my duty as a boyfriend, to spoil you".

The word makes her heart _leap_. "Boyfriend, uh?"

Ben searches her eyes, a nervous expression on his face, but the same intensity she has come to known as _his_ on his features. His hands are still trembling, but they grip her hips more firmly, his thumb drawing small circles against her hipbone, above her shirt. He's hesitant, but also deeply earnest in the way he stares at her, intensity dripping from his eyes as he stutters on his words, the old duality she's falling in love with.

"I didn't want to assume- I shouldn't-"

She doesn't even let him finish. "You should," she tells him, quietly, with a smile on her lips. "You should definitely assume".

He lets out a deep breath and he looks so relieved as the same boyish smile she has learned to love spreads on his face. She can feel his heart, thundering against his ribcage with a dull sound. "Thank God," he murmurs, before pulling her in another magnificent kiss.

It's slow and tender and lazy - his lips are as soft as the first time and his fingers trace small patterns along her clothed skin, and it feels so domestic and wonderful, everything she never knew she wanted until Ben had walked into her life, with red ears and a crooked grin. The first rays of sun filter through the window, enveloping them as they kiss for what it feels like a lifetime, half naked in his tiny kitchen, and it's the most sacred moment of her life.

"Now," she whispers on his mouth, as she breaks away to breathe. "You were telling me about these pancakes ..."

Her words are met with a chuckle, and a kiss to her cheek.

**Author's Note:**

> real talk: the real kink here is Ben cooking for Rey and taking care of her and being all-around the perfect boyfriend for her :D
> 
> also, am on [twitter](https://twitter.com/akosmia) and [tumblr](http://kylorensx.tumblr.com/) if you want to chat or scream at me or anything else. i'm the most awkward person when it comes to human interaction, so don't mind me if i'm a bit awkward, but i promise i'll always reply ♥ also, there's a link to my ko-fi on my tumblr, if you want to support me so I can write more fluffy stupid things. and that's all, see you next story and thank you so much for reading it ♥


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